Understanding Neuroqueer Identities: Where Neurodivergence Meets LGBTQ+ Identity
- kaitlynboudreault
- 3 days ago
- 7 min read
Have you heard the term “neuroqueer” before?
This term has become increasingly common in society lately.
So the odds are you have heard it before.
But you may be wondering, what exactly does it mean to be neuroqueer, and who coined the term in the first place?
To understand what “neuroqueer” means, it is important to first understand how society shapes identity.
At this time, society is largely structured around certain expectations surrounding what brains and ways of expressing love are superior compared to others. We live in a society that expects people to think, feel, and express themselves in certain ways.
These expectations are rooted in heteronormativity and neuronormativity.
Heteronormativity is the belief that heterosexual relationships and cisgender identities and expressions of love are the default and the “normal” way of being. Neuronormativity follows a similar notion and assumes that neurotypical ways of thinking, learning, and interacting with the world are superior to neurodivergent brains.
When individuals identify outside of these heterosexual, cisgender, or neurotypical guidelines, they are often looked down upon by society.
Many neuroqueer individuals who fall at the intersection of neurodivergence and 2SLGBTQ+ experience face unique challenges shaped by societal norms that don’t support their identity. If you are experiencing these challenges, a neuroqueer-affirming therapist in Ontario, Canada, can support you.
These clinicians approach therapy from a perspective that validates identity, embraces difference, and focuses on strength-based support.
In this edition of Bee Kind Counselling’s neuroqueer-affirming blog, we explore more about what neuroqueer identity means, the common challenges faced by neuroqueer individuals, and provide various strategies and practical resources for neuroqueer individuals.
What Is Neurodivergence?
During the Autistic Rights Movement around the 1990s and early 2000s, autistic advocates recognized that there were non-autistic individuals whose neurocognition, or way in which they navigate and interact with the world, differed from the norm.
Around 2000, Kassiane Asasumasu, an autistic rights advocate, coined the terms “neurodivergent” and “neurodivergence.”
The term “neurodivergent” involves individuals whose brains diverge from what society would deem as typical, also known as “neuronormativity” or “neuronormative standards”.
“Neurodivergent” is an umbrella term because new neurotypes can be added or removed as we increase our understanding of neurodivergence as a society.
At the current moment, the neurodivergent umbrella includes a variety of neurodivergent identities, including:
Dyslexia
Tourette’s Syndrome
Other learning differences
Epilepsy
And more
Some individuals may hold multiple neurodivergent identities. For example, someone may be an AuDHDer, which combines autism and ADHD.
Unlike the medical model, which views neurodivergence as something that needs to be fixed, Kassaine used the term “neurodivergence” within the neurodiversity-affirming framework, which views these differences as natural variations in human cognition, not deficits.
Challenges Faced by Neurodivergent Individuals
Neurodivergence is a spectrum, which means that each neurodivergent brain experiences the world differently and faces unique individual challenges.
But there are some common challenges among neurodivergent individuals, including:
Difficulty focusing or sustaining attention
Challenges with time management and executive functioning
Sensory sensitivities
Difficulty regulating emotions or sensitivity to rejection
Difficulty initiating tasks or making decisions
Forgetfulness or disorganization
Feeling misunderstood or unseen
Despite these challenges, neurodivergent individuals also contribute unique strengths, perspectives, creativity, and problem-solving skills that strengthen communities and workplaces.
Breaking Down the 2SLGBTQIA+ Acronym
In recent decades, there has been an increase in societal understanding of what the 2SLGBTQ+ means. But there is still widespread hatred and misconceptions surrounding people who are part of this community.
At the basic level, the 2SLGBTQIA+ acronym represents a wide spectrum of sexual orientations and gender identities.
Let’s break these down below.
2S: Two-Spirit: Non-binary identities recognized in some Indigenous communities.
L: Lesbian: Women who are emotionally, sexually, or romantically attracted to other women.
G: Gay: Men who are emotionally, sexually, or romantically attracted to other men.
B: Bisexual: Individuals who are attracted to both men and women.
T: Transgender: Individuals whose gender identity differs from the sex assigned at birth.
Q: Queer: An umbrella term that represents anyone whose sexual orientation and/or gender identity falls outside cis/heteronormative labels; “questioning” refers to exploration.
Q: Questioning: Individuals who are exploring their identity and questioning whether or not they fall outside of cisheteronormative labels.
I: Intersex – Chromosomes, anatomy, or traits not fitting male/female norms.
A: Asexual: Limited or no sexual attraction to others. This is a spectrum, and the level of sexual attraction differs for each asexual individual.
A: Aromantic: Limited or no romantic attraction to others. This is also a spectrum, and romantic attraction differs among individuals who are aromantic
A: Agender: Individuals who identify as not having a gender.
+ (Plus): Represents the infinite number of identities not explicitly included above that fall outside of cisheteronormative labels.
Understanding these terms is essential for creating affirming spaces that validate identity rather than forcing conformity.
What Does “Neuroqueer” Mean?
“Neuroqueer” is a term that was coined by Dr. Nick Walker. It describes individuals whose identities intersect neurodivergence and 2SLGBTQ+ experiences.
The term emphasizes that divergence from neuronormative and/or cisheteronormative standards is not a deficit, disorder, or something to be fixed. It is a natural human variation in identity.
There is research that indicates that there is a strong correlation between neurodivergence and 2SLGBTQ+ identification. For example, research from the University of Cambridge found that autistic individuals are three times more likely to identify as trans and eight times more likely to identify as asexual.
At this time, researchers haven’t identified a single reason for this higher rate of 2SLGBTQ+ identification among neurodivergent people as opposed to the general population.
Instead, there are several theories of what may contribute to this overlap, including:
Neurodivergent individuals may be less constrained by societal norms, which allows freer exploration of sexual and gender identity.
Both communities often share experiences of discrimination, which can foster a sense of connection.
Neurodivergent individuals may engage in heightened self-reflection and identity exploration.
For many, the term “neuroqueer” validates the intersection of neurodivergence and LGBTQ+ identity.
Unique Challenges Neuroqueer Individuals May Face
While neuroqueer individuals often face similar issues to non-neuroqueer individuals, such as depression, anxiety, self-esteem challenges, or relationship issues, neuroqueer individuals also face unique challenges. These challenges include:
Stigma related to neurodivergence
Dealing with non-accepting loved ones
Discrimination, bullying, and bigotry for sexual orientation or gender identity
Masking or hiding neurodivergent traits for safety or acceptance
Hiding sexual or gender identity in certain settings
Difficulty finding affirming healthcare providers
Increased risk of anxiety, depression, or burnout
Internalized stigma from societal norms
Being outed without consent
Trauma, including religious trauma, related to 2SLGBTQIA+ hate
These overlapping experiences highlight the need for affirming therapy for neuroqueer individuals and community support.
What Is Neuroqueer-Affirming Therapy?
Neuroqueer-affirming therapy is therapy that supports both neurodivergent and 2SLGBTQ+ identities. A neuroqueer-affirming therapist will:
Recognize that neurodivergence, gender identity, and sexual orientation are not problems to fix.
Affirm gender identity, neurodivergence, and sexual orientation, without attempting to change them.
Encourage the development of a positive identity.
Focus on strengths, identity development, and empowerment
Provide a safe space to explore discrimination, stigma, and systemic barriers.
Support clients in navigating relationships, work, and daily life as a neuroqueer individual
Acknowledge systemic oppression and the shame and stigma that neurodivergent and 2SLGBTQ+ people face
Counteract neuronormative and cisheteronormative standards and advocate for a world where everyone feels safe and accepted.
At the heart of neuroqueer-affirming therapy, this therapy approach fosters authenticity, self-acceptance, and pride in one’s intersecting identities.
12 Ways to Run a Neuroqueer-Affirming Practice
Providing neuroqueer-affirming therapy is not something that happens overnight. Being neuroqueer-affirming involves the continuous practice of unlearning your biases surrounding 2SLGBTQ+ and neurodivergent identities.
It also involves learning how you can support these communities. If you are a clinician seeking to create a neuroqueer-affirming environment, here are some of the ways that you can start doing so:
Ask for pronouns and neurodivergence status on intake forms.
Recognize how heteronormativity and neuronormativity create systemic barriers.
Offer sensory-friendly environments (e.g., dim lighting, noise control, fidget tools).
Maintain strict confidentiality regarding identity.
Stay informed about media bias against neuroqueer communities.
Allow flexible session timing and breaks for executive or sensory needs.
Encourage identity exploration without judgment.
Address internalized stigma and societal norms affecting clients.
Include intersectional frameworks addressing racism, ableism, and sexism.
Focus on acceptance of identity, not changing the person.
Reflect on your own biases about neurodivergence and LGBTQ+ identities.
Consult and collaborate with other neurodivergent-affirming and LGBTQ+-affirming clinicians.
Neuroqueer Resources
Neuroqueer individuals are more likely to experience mental health conditions because of societal hate. As a result, support and community are essential for neuroqueer individuals. Some resources include:
LGBTQ+ Youthline: Ontario peer support line for youth and young adults (29 and under): Text 647-694-4275 from Sunday to Friday between 4:00 pm - 9:30 pm EST
Pflag Canada: Peer support, advocacy, and education nationwide
Trans Lifeline: Crisis support and microgrants for trans individuals in Canada. It is the only lifeline in Canada that is 100% divested from police.
Lived Experience Educator: Sonny Jane: Trans, multiply neurodivergent advocate, author of The Neurodivergent Friendly Workbook of DBT Skills
Neurodivergent Rebel (Lyric Rivera): Trans-nonbinary, autistic self-advocate, and consultant
How Bee Kind Counselling Can Support Neuroqueer Clients
Bee Kind Counselling is a neurodivergent, 2SLGBTQ+, and Indigenous-owned business that provides neuroqueer-affirming and culturally sensitive mental health care to individuals in Ontario, Canada.
Therapists at Bee Kind Counselling work within LGBTQ+-affirming and neurodiversity-affirming frameworks to:
Provide safe spaces to explore identity.
Recognize systemic oppression and discrimination.
Support clients through experiences of stigma or rejection.
Encourage self-acceptance, pride, and empowerment.
Offer practical strategies for daily life, relationships, and career.
Book a Free Consultation With Bee Kind Counselling
Are you a neurodivergent individual who is exploring your identity within the 2SLGBTQ+ community?
Do you identify as a 2SLGBTQ+ individual who is exploring their brain differences and considering the fact that they may be neurodivergent?
Bee Kind Counselling offers LGBTQ+-affirming and neurodivergent-affirming therapy to support individuals navigating mental health, identity, and life transitions.
You can book a free consultation by emailing admin@beekindcounselling.com, calling 519-757-7842, or booking online.
Sources
Weir, E., Allison, C., Baron-Cohen, S. (2021). The sexual health, orientation, and activity of autistic adolescents and adults. International Society of Autism Research. https://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/10.1002/aur.2604
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